HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY GABRIEL, SON!

MAMA LOVES YOU!!!!!!

Wow, six weeks had flew by!
That fast.

and last Tuesday, i found myself staring at my Biology paper which stared back at me, looking like a foreign object.

AAHHH!
needless to say, i think i'm not gonna do as well as Semester One.

Everyone in class in ranting on the amount of schoolwork we are being flooded with. It dawned on me later on, like after Wednesday of the amount of work we REALLY ARE to do!

Presentations, ICAs, practicals.
Eee, i hate practicals!


Oh, the life of a student!

Let's build a time machine and go back to holidays!
MY HOLIDAY was way better! My holiday when i had no school for 6 months when everyone was in school. Life was so lazy, and slow. Just days of staying at home and having so much sleep that i want. But i felt my life was on standstill then and wished for busier times. (i shouldn't have complained, hah!)

We all live in a beautiful world but life keeps us too busy to appreciate it.

sleep, is what i need.
I have been friggin getting 3-4 hours of sleep!

25th November.
The day i have been waiting for, anticipating and looking forward to be over.

SO LIKE, FINALLY!
I AM SO HAPPY!!!

I am of mixed emotions after Child's Play ended today.
Elated, proud, disappointed and relieved (RELIEVED, IT'S OVER!)


I get feedback, with some saying "Congratulations! your event had been a success!" or, "Well DONE! We enjoyed ourselves!" or "Child's Play had been a smashing success!"

It feels so good to hear and feels weird at the same time.
Feels weird because i am somehow not convinced otherwise.

But..

it feels good that at the end of the day, i see the Children with smiles on their faces, enjoying their candyfloss with glee, recieving their toys with happy faces.

it feels good that at the end of the day, everyone who helped out, be it the volunteers for facils, games stations and the committee enjoyed themselves.

it feels good that at the end of the day, everyone in the committee worked together. and i get to give them a hug, :D

it feels good that at the end of the day, it is all over!

after all these while, the past few months of effort for this external event, i had made myself stressed out, shed many tears, been sleep deprived, had bad temper,been too busy to eat proper meals and been running off during breaks to get this and that done.

I never thought, that i would go this far.
Upon being given the role, i had wanted to backed out and not take up the responsibility.I dismissed the thoughts away, not wanting to embarrass myself and be known as someone who backed off from her responsibilities.

Many at a time, i wonder to myself "Why am i putting so much effort and time into this? What's all this for?I don't even get to benefit from doing all this!". I would cry, with despair that i have been lousy in managing and getting this and that done. I shed tears, when i was so stressed that we were running out of time.

I don't know what drives me, to continue all the way. From the beginning, i had told Elyn & Mardiana that i would be leaving them to responsibilities and go Missing-in-Action. Which didn't happen of course lah.

That's why i was so happy when the Proposal got approved, after the 1st proposal got rejected. and i got annoyed when Wen Yang said "What for so happy? Approved only mah. Still got execution of the proposal"

Tsk tsk, killjoy lah!

and and, all this while, especially before the proposal got approved, i got temperamental. and my emotions are like rollercoaster. Very high one moment, then after that very angry.

Oh well!

It's over now.
and everything would not have been possible if not for everyone!

and i wanna say a BIG THANK YOU too everyone in the committee, especially to Elyn, Wani
and Nas! Wouldn't have known what to do if not for them!

I AM HAPPY!

Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me.

John 14:1 (KJV)

How could i forget this favourite verse of mine?
:D

I feel down.
Where did my confidence in myself go to?

And i don't like the fact that i'm not myself anymore.
I hate the fact that i don't laugh as loud and heartily like i did before.
I hate the fact that i'm always so scared of how people think of me and being judged.
I hate the fact that i worry all the time.
I hate the fact that i've commented on that i'm so negative when i wasn't before.
I hate the fact that i don't think carefully first.

:(

I don't dare do any action, lest i make more mistakes?


Am i too hard on myself?
I guess i've been thinking too much lately.

I THINK..

I JUST LOST ALL MY LINKS!
WTH!

It's the weekends!
and i'm all smiles again!

I woke up in the early afternoon, with intentions of having this and that done.
well..

I am too lazy to do anything productive today.


Been procrastinating and nagging at myself to get this and that done.
Let's see, so far, i only have done 1/4 of the health assessment homework and the PNPE's slides layout & misc and of course, i have changed my layout again.

i've always wanted to do something simple.
Like you know, focus on the content/text rather than the blog's colourful backgrounds..
Oh, the links are not updated. They were from 2 years back.
I'll put my updated links asap.


and it's freaking 3.40am and i haven't slept yet!
OMG!

Happy 18 Birthday Anira!
<3

Today will be, and had been a lazy day!
I am happy, happy :D


Thank God It's Saturday!
I get to have my sleep, do my homework and today is all for myself! and maybe go for a little shopping later!

It's been so long since i had my Saturday all tom myself!
:D

and Oh, Thank you Prawneh for the very last minute outing!

Friday at 5.30pm i was walking out of school and i gave her a call.

S: Prawneh! You finish school already? Wanna go watch movie with me?
P: Huh? I'm on my way home now, watch movie now?
S: Yeah, now! Feel like de-stressing uh!
P: OK, go meet at lot 1!

Hahahaha! I never tried this one on her before! Very on ah, Prawneh! Olivia was also saying it was random!

Watched Michael Jackson's This is It.
The concert would have been nice.
But i think die hard fans would have enjoyed it more.

Bought tickets to Love Happens actually and we changed it!


ANYHUHOW!

I haven't been here in my blog and updating much since school started.
It seems like so.. yesterday that i was dreading the coming of school.
and it's now week 4 ?!


So much has happened.

Hectic schedule lah, ICAs coming, new subgroups, my eye got infection again (-.-"), Dad and mom are overseas (DID I MENTION THAT? heehee!)

what else?
I can't squeeze my brainjuices out now!

Let's just look at the overdue pictures!

Not so long ago, celebrated Anira's, Wen Yan's and Chalotte's Birthdays last wednesday.

Last week, the event proposal got approved!
Happy, happy, happy, happy, happyyyyy can!

On Halloween!
Of all days, i have to wake up on a Saturday, with redness, swelling and pain in my eye. My eye had to be like this over the weekend. On Sunday, didn't go to Church cos the pain was killing me. By evening, it was like hundreds of pins poking my eye. Dad and mom made me promise to see another doctor otherwise they don't allow me to go to school on monday at all. On monday morning, i woke up, my eye was no longer red, no longer painful and no longer tearing.

Made me waste $80 on seeing 2 doctors :(

Next day, Tuesday.
Mom and dad will be out of town for two weeks!

I tihnk i am so used to them being out of town now. BUT! I am like a part time mother/father, part time housekeeper and full time student!

Timbre

looking at this makes me wanna drool now.
It just taste sooooooooooo good!
Beef with Onions Pizza

Alane

Hahahaha!

That girl, with the heineken thingy.
Got drunk.
Hahahahha!

See, hear, speak, smell no evil!

Jumpshots
Me & Jumpshots = Fail
Why?

I am a zombie

I ended up chest bumping

Run, Chase, Victorious

Games day with a team people
we literally ran from vivocity's amphitheatre to the tram and everyone loOked at us!


I like!

Wrong Hole!
Our group's name was wrong hole and we won the champion group :D


Kuya Alvin & Tita Lenny's Wedding

I was so upset :(
I had to miss the bride marching in, the exchange of vows..
at 7pm, i was at YCK taxi stand, waiting and dialling for a cab and everyone was trying to get a cab in the rainy weather.

by 7.30pm, i finally got a cab and managed to arrive only at 8pm after everything was over. Only time to eat, hahahaha!

Picture credits: Antoinette, William, Jeanette

I'm having doubts.
I am having doubts if everything will run out smoothly, as planned.

I keep wondering where have we gone wrong?
Where have i gone wrong?

- Not enough thorough planning done?
- I'm a greenhorn in this?
- I have not been allocating tasks?


and, i think everyone now thinks of me as a sensitive, incompetent person.
:(




I wonder why.
Why am i a different person to different groups of people.
With my friends, i am just.. myself.
Loud and confident.
Confident.
and when i am confident, i could do my best.



But when i'm around certain people, i tend to be less confident.


and yes, my close friends would know me best.
That when i am unhappy, angry or is bothered with someone, I would keep it to myself and not confront that person.
Till i can't take it anymore.


Yes, i haven't gotten rid of this weakness of mine.

Crazy October and November.

Crazy spendings. Crazy hours of sleep. Broke. Taxi. A wedding. Parents away. The Proposal approved. Spoilt Ipod. Horrendous overstressed hypersensitive eye. ICAs. Moodswings.

Stress.


I'd like to explain and elaborate more.
Time does not allow me to.

I think i don't like what's happening to myself.

I have been on rollercoaster ride.
My mood is like a rollercoaster and unpredictable at that too.

I think at times, i felt like i was bursting.

all i have think,
IT'LL BE OVER SOON!


omgz,
someone help me get Beth's testimonial from school!

HALLO BLOG!

I MISS YOU!
I WANT TO WRITE SO MUCH STUFF ON YOU, YOU WAIT TILL I GET MY HANDS FREE!


I MISS WRITING DOWN MY THOUGHTS!

and i wanna talk about my stupid hypersensitive eye!
TSK TSK!

headstrong

MY EYE HURTS LIKE CRAZY, AS I AM TYPING HERE.
AND IT IS TEARING LIKE A WATERFALL.


i think my parents are not gonna allow me to go to school tomorrow.
Mom is worried sick cos they'll be flying on tuesday morning.
What if i have to be hospitalised again?
Visit me, people ah!

But i don't want to miss school, especially lab lessons.
I don't want to go for make-up classes again.

:(
:(

I HOPE MY EYE WONT HURT AS BAD.
HALP.