Where am i? I think i lost myself along the way.
Lost like i don't know myself anymore. Like how i want to have a peaceful sleep at night after watching a horror movie, i tell myself to forget what i have watched or heard. Not wanting to feel the disappointment in life, i don't think of the negatives.I divert those thoughts and engross myself in something entertaining (eg. boys over flowers) But i have been so successful at it all this while, it kinda surprises me that i have been so numb. That i don't care anymore. And for now, i have lost my enthusiasm, like something in me died. No motivation!
Or maybe could it be the lack of sleep i have everyday? I am abusing my body by refusing to give it the rightful amount of hours of rest it should have. And being stubborn by not heeding advice.
And why do i care so much for, of what people think. I don't know why it bothers me so much, of how others perceive one. So what do i actually really want, i ask myself. To have that (insert word here), or to be all that and that. Eiyar, i am confusing myself now, Har.
Gah, but i blame myself for why things happens. Or am i being overly sensitive?
People change don't they? I lost myself along the way, i don't do the things i used to do anymore, i do things i did not used to do. Hah!
Now, i shall not wallow in self pity, now i shall not do so, now i shall not.
Lost like i don't know myself anymore. Like how i want to have a peaceful sleep at night after watching a horror movie, i tell myself to forget what i have watched or heard. Not wanting to feel the disappointment in life, i don't think of the negatives.I divert those thoughts and engross myself in something entertaining (eg. boys over flowers) But i have been so successful at it all this while, it kinda surprises me that i have been so numb. That i don't care anymore. And for now, i have lost my enthusiasm, like something in me died. No motivation!
Or maybe could it be the lack of sleep i have everyday? I am abusing my body by refusing to give it the rightful amount of hours of rest it should have. And being stubborn by not heeding advice.
And why do i care so much for, of what people think. I don't know why it bothers me so much, of how others perceive one. So what do i actually really want, i ask myself. To have that (insert word here), or to be all that and that. Eiyar, i am confusing myself now, Har.
Gah, but i blame myself for why things happens. Or am i being overly sensitive?
People change don't they? I lost myself along the way, i don't do the things i used to do anymore, i do things i did not used to do. Hah!
Now, i shall not wallow in self pity, now i shall not do so, now i shall not.
fill that void within me, please.
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